“The Namesake” by Jhumpa Lahiri

This book is the story of an immigrant child, born in the United States to Indian parents of Bengali ethnicity. I just realized Bengal is divided between two nations, India and Bangladesh, which just emphasizes the elements of uncertainty and confusion that surround the protagonist Gogol, also known by several other names – Nikhil, Nick and even Goggles. 

Gogol grows into an intelligent, handsome architect. Lahiri tells the story of his heart – who he loves, and why. 

This book is richly detailed, and I recommend it highly.

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“Unaccustomed Earth” by Jhumpa Lahiri

I got this book from a Little Free Library. I planned to leave five books and take one. Nice try. I ended up with three. 

Jhumpa Lahiri introduces this collection of eight short stories with a two-sentence quotation from Nathaniel Hawthorne:

“Human nature will not flourish, any more than a potato, if it be planted and replanted, for too long a series of generations, in the same worn-out soil. My children have had other birthplaces, and so far as their fortunes may be within my control, shall strike their roots into unaccustomed earth.”

Never mind the stories. Lahiri could have stopped right here and I would have had plenty to think about. I was unable to determine what book contained this statement. Doesn’t sound like The Scarlett Letter. Bartlett’s Familiar Quotations didn’t help me.

Last weekend, I attended the funeral of a neighbor. His family has been in this area for around five generations. I could see and even envy the value, strength and warmth of strong family ties. Sometimes I wish I had relatives in this town, this county, this STATE, for goodness sake! It’s hard work to keep in touch with a geographically dispersed family. To my children, cousins and aunts and uncles were a treat, not their daily bread. I wish they had been able to spend more time with their grandparents. 

On the other hand, the world is changing. For better or worse, globalization is here. Parents (especially upper middle class parents) may choose to nudge their children towards out-ot-state colleges or international work and study experiences. 

I’ve seen all kinds of family patterns. One is “up and out”. My family took this approach, sending my sister and me away to college, telling us we had four years to get ready for life “on our own”. Return to our hometown was barely mentioned. We thought it likely to be “too expensive”. When I had the option spend summers in Europe, it was encouraged, even though, financially, it was only a “break even” proposition. But I think my parents would have felt hurt and sad if I had settled down overseas.

I only read two stories from Lahiri’s book. Each ending surprised me. Her characters are compelling and their lives seem difficult. I can’t decide whether to continue with the stories or try one of Lahiri’s novels. She has published books in Italian and Marathi. The international approach to life is plainly here choice.

“Ghostbuster’s Daughter – Life With my Dad, Harold Ramis” by Violet Ramis Stiel

This book was recommended to me by my comedian son, who lives in Chicago, home of the Second City Comedy troupe and, for a time, Harold Ramis and family.

But the real “hook” for me was Ghostbusters! The movie was released in 1984, the same year my older son was born. A huge hit! Wildly funny. Lots of ancillary products, like T-shirts. I can’t remember at what age we first took Ben to see it. It totally captured his imagination, and became his first “commercialized” passion. Our best purchase was Ghostbuster coveralls, with “Who You Gonna Call?” on the back. Both boys wore them. I’d have bought a pair for myself, if I saw them in my size.

Phrases from the movie worked their way into our daily conversation and have remained to this day. The best were “Back off, man, I’m a scientist!” and Ramis/Egon’s great deadpan line “I collect spores, molds and fungus”. We still refer to any deteriorated property as “a unique fixer upper opportunity” and remind each other “everybody has three mortgages”. “You really eat this stuff?”

So I have to tell you I was hoping for more details about Ghostbusters, which the book did not provide. The book moves sequentially through Steil’s life. I hadn’t known how many films Ramis was involved with as actor, writer, director and/or producer. Steil visited the sets of most of the movies, but her reminisces weren’t particular enlightening.

The personal chapters were more interesting. Violet Ramis Steil is a lively and perceptive writer. This wasn’t my first entertainment world autobiography. Bottom line, I don’t know how the children of celebrities survive! They are exposed to drugs and crazy adult behavior, and sometimes forced to grow up fast because their parents are irresponsible. Harold Ramis had his wilder moments, but settled down in his second marriage. He became wealthy and was generous towards his daughter and many other people.

Stiel’s discussion of her education and career choice was interesting. She knew she did not want to join the entertainment world. She wanted to help people, and went to graduate school to study social work, specializing in maternal and child health and welfare. Approving wholeheartedly, Ramis subsidized her so that she could live in Manhattan on a social worker’s salary. 

The chapters about Ramis’s death are terribly painful. In 2010, he developed diverticulitis, followed by infection and a brain damaging stroke. Thinking he might recover and return to the work he loved, his wife limited the information that was shared outside the family. Four years of terrible struggle followed. Ramis experienced painful and repeated complications, seizures, treatments, and rehabilitation. No one should suffer that way.

I can’t find out what Violet R Stiel has been doing since her book was published in 2018. After the reviews, she’s been relatively invisible – not in Wikipedia, minimally present on Facebook. (Maybe I just don’t know where to look.) I hope she’s writing. Maybe she’ll provide commentary on the pandemic!